Kids are amazing aren’t they?  Such polite, well mannered, saying “thank you, Ma’am, Yes sir,” do what they are told…..what? Are you calling me crazy?  I know what you are thinking. Kids don’t act like that, right?  Is it impossible?  Well,I’m not saying It won’t be difficult, but if given the right discipline and instruction as young children, they are able to grow and develop into wonderful young men and women later on.

Happy kids start with a happy marriage: Do you enjoy listening to your kids fighting with eachother? Of course not! It makes your eardrums bleed and the hair on your skin stand up. The screaming, crying, name calling just makes you want to grab the nearest…ok, lets not get too dramatic, but kids feel the exact same way we do when they hear their parents fighting. They hate it! It makes them depressed and lonely. Kids really need a stable family life to feel secure and comfortable at home.

Sit at the dinner table: This is one of the best times to bond as a family. Kids get to talk about their day in school, how they are feeling and talk about whatever problems they are having. Take advantage of this opportunity to listen to your child, whether they are happy or upset.  They need to know that Mom and Dad care what they have to say and it makes them feel secure that they can confide in someone they trust. Kids love the attention, and dinner time is one of the best times for it!

Watch what they eat: If your kids just love gulping down those soft drinks, pouring  pounds of maple syrup on their pancakes and chowing three doughnuts in one sitting….nip it in the bud, now.  If you think I am exaggerating on what I just said, I have actually seen a few kids in my day literally eat like that on a daily basis. Sugar and high fructose corn syrup is very bad for your kids health and can cause them problems such as diabetes later on in life.  the younger you teach your kids good eating habits, the easier it will be on their health when they are adults.  A healthy kid is a happy kid!

Turn off the tube: Yes, that’s right…..turn it off. I know its hard to do when you need to get something done and plopping them in front the the big colorful machine would be  an easy thing to do.  Unfortunately, studies have shown that too much television can lead to learning and behavioral problems.  Bring out the coloring books and crayons instead and let their imaginations go wild!

Be wary of who they befriend:  Children, especially younger ones, are easily influenced by watching how other children act.  If your child is around rough-housing bad mouthed kids, your own child will think its OK to act that way.  Make sure when your young ones are around others, they are safe from bad influences and teach them early on that acting inappropriately is not right. Plus, teaching them on what types of kids to hang around with in their younger years will give them a better understanding on how to  choose the right friends when they get older.

Get them involved in extracurricular activities: My daughter is very exited to start soccer next year.  She is full of energy and very athletic so getting her involved in a sport would be ideal for her. Know you r child’s personality before getting them involved in something. If your little one loves instruction and seems patient when learning a new task, dance or music lessons would be a great starting point. If your child is hyper and loves to run around and can’t sit still, you may want to try a sport instead. either way, its a great way to make them feel like they can accomplish something.

Be a good role model:  Yep, your kids are watching you like a hawk,  and learning everything you do. They watch how you talk to people and treat others,  how you respond in certain stressful situations,  and yes, they even hear you on the phone gossiping to your friends about someone else. Little children have ears and eyes….  THEY ARE WATCHING YOU.  Be a good example, by showing them respect and patience. Even little things such as saying “thank you” to someone, or opening the door for that little old lady with a cane.  How your children behave is a reflection of how you raise them.

It’s Mother’s day, and some Dad’s are going out getting their wives the usual flowers and balloons for their special day. I mean, that’s great, but we, the mothers of this world might be asking for something a little different than just the supermarket gifts.  My husband took my three year old daughter off my hands for a little while this morning and went to the park  so I could relax for a couple of hours.  (of course I had my one year old son with me but he’s pretty good for a quiet baby loi!)

If you are wondering what other secret wishes your wife (or even your own mom) might want for their special day, I came up with a few ideas.

1. Do the dishes, laundry and any other daily house work that might come to mind. I know it’s a bit of a push for Dads who work 9 to 5 and bring home the bacon, but understand, mother’s have a full time job too; Raising little human beings.  Getting any house work done is a challenge alone for them, so helping out with the chores for one day would be a HUGE help!

2. Take the kids out for a few hours. Every mother can only imagine what it must must sound like to have a quiet house.  Its been a while since we’ve heard any crickets chirping, so why not take the kiddos somewhere for a bit while letting mommy chill out with a hot bath or read a good book.

3.  Let Mommy sleep in.  If the kids get up early, that means dad gets up early.  Get the screaming, hungry little monsters dressed, breakfast and outside to play so mommy can have an extra hour or two of happy dreaming.

4. Make a homemade gift with the kids.  It may sound a little tacky for some Dads, but getting something made from the hearts of her little children (with dad’s help, of course) makes it all worth while.  I always keep my daughters pictures that she draws for me in a keepsake box so getting a handmade gift would be saved as a precious memory.

My son became a certified one year old yesterday! So this year I decided to do something a little different than the traditional birthday cake. My three year old daughter wanted cupcakes, so I thought ok, thats sounds fun. It took a few tries getting the frosting to look like a soft serve ice cream cone but either way, my kids absolutly loved them…..and so did my husband (who didn’t even wait for me to frost them, he just ate them right from the oven lol!)

My son ate my delicious cupcakes without hesitation and of course made a complete but adorable mess!

Here is the recipe for anyone who wants to try out these ice cream cone cupcakes for yourself.



2 1/4 cups flour

1 1/2 sugar

3 1/2 tsp baking powder

1 teaspoon salt

1 1/4 cups milk

2 table spoons vegetable oil

1 stick butter (1/2 cup) softened

1 tablespoon vanilla extract

3 large eggs


Prepare cones:  Wrap each cone with aluminum foil and place in muffin pan. Set aside.

In large bowl mix well flour, sugar, baking powder and salt

add milk, vegetable oil, butter and vanilla to the flour mixture.  Beat with electric mixer on medium high for 2 minutes scraping sides of bowl.

Add eggs and contimue beating for another 2 minutes.

Pour batter into cones FILLING ONLY HALF WAY.  (If you fill too much, they will pour out of cones and deflate at the top.)

Place muffin pan in oven set at 350 degrees for 25 minutes or until tops are golden.

Let stand and cool before frosting cones.

The divorce rate is somewhere around 50% and climbing.  For me, I think that is a bad (and certainly obvious) sign that people don’t take their marriage vows seriously.  Why do people get married?  They say they were in love…..at the time, and then things just started going down hill. Little quarrels over stupid things turn into arguments, and arguments turn into big fights that continue on and on until someone says DIVORCE.   To most people, divorce is the easy way out.  But why do we fight?

My husband and I heard a great sermon in church a few weeks ago about why spouses argue and fight with each other. Don’t worry, I’m not going to go preaching to you, but the pastor did make some very important points which I would like to share.  The word the he used was SELFISHNESS.  We are all selfish by nature.  The wife wants it one way when the husband wants it another.  Neither care about the other’s needs and this is where the arguments happen.

Is it possible to have a happy marriage? Yes!  But don’t go into a marriage thinking it will be all rainbows and flowers.  It takes work, hard work.  There will be a lot of sacrificing on your part (and your spouses) to make that happen.  You need to think of your partner’s needs….not yours.  Here are some strategies that I found to be helpful in maintaining a good relationship with your spouse.

Don’t put down your spouse outside the home. I’m sure you have heard your friends say “my husband never does…” or “my wife can’t do…” Sometimes we may be doing it without thinking, or we may do it because everyone else is doing it.  It is just wrong, plain and simple. If you really love your spouse, you will give them the highest respect when discussing them to your friends and co workers. BE AN EXAMPLE!  When you start talking about your spouse in a bad way outside the home, you end up bringing what you say inside the home.  Your negative views about them start to become deeper over time.

Don’t fight in front of the children: This one should be a no-brainer.  marital conflicts have a lasting affect on young children. When they see their parents arguing and fighting, they will learn that this form of behavior is what will solve everything. They begin to fight with their friends, start fights in school, and as they grow up they will continue a domino effect and fight with their own spouse.  In order for your children to have healthy relationships in the future, you need to have a healthy relationship in the home.

Don’t reverse the argument: I think most of us have had and argument that went like this;

Spouse 1 “I can’t believe you did that….”

Spouse 2 “Oh yeah? Well you really ticked me off when you did this….”

Spouse 1 “Oh really? Well, don’t forget the time you did that”….blah blah blah.

Whats the point in bringing up each other’s faults?   You will never solve the problem and this kind of arguing will only escalate into something worse.  If your spouse is upset with you for something, sometimes you need to accept the fault and just apologize.

Accept the apology: This one pretty much follows suit with what I mentioned above.  It is so easy to continue nagging after your partner apologizes.  You just want to drive it in their hollow little brain until they understand what you want, right?  You feel that they still don’t “get it” and you won’t leave them alone until they do.  This kind of tactic makes your partner feel that apologies mean nothing to you and will soon give up and think apologizing is a waste of time.  Com’on now, lets get real here.  If your spouse apologizes, he  or she is accepting the fault and does not want to argue anymore.  Even if you think they still don’t “get it, ” who cares. Here is where you think of your spouses feelings and put away your own. It’s called SACRIFICE.

Some other little tidbits…

Tell your spouse you are proud of them! My husband told me how proud he was that I have been doing great with taking care of the kids and working on my home business. He knows how tired and stressed I have been, but knowing that he understands makes me feel blessed.

Give them a hug everyday! I know it may seem obvious or just plain silly, but something like a simple little hug can make someone’s day so much better.  I love it when I have been having one of those “mommy freaking out” days and my husband comes over and hugs me. It is absolutely the best medicine!

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It’s a pretty strange experience. We get into a comfortable 9 to 5 routine in the working class society, not giving it a second thought.  Its just what everybody does….we work for a living.  Then you suddenly find yourself in the mist of motherhood and everything changes.  This tiny little bundle of joy wants YOU….morning, noon, and night. You are the one he wants feeding him, holding him and rocking him to sleep.  Welcome to your new life. Yes, you thought you prepared for it over the last nine months but now this little person is here, and reality sinks in.

That’s how I felt three years ago when my daughter was born.  I was so used to working everyday, living my own life and doing my own thing.  Now I am home with someone dependent on me to take care of her.  I have thought about going back to work, or to school to finish my degree, and actually managed to study for two years at community college, but when my son was born last year it started to become more of a challenge. Some people may think being a stay home mother is taking the lazy way out.  They vision us sitting home watching soap operas and maybe….just maybe, getting a little housecleaning done. Some actual mothers out there may think they made the wrong choice and feel they aren’t useful in society anymore.  They fear a nervous breakdown when the kids are screaming, the house is a disaster and dread the thought of someone ringing the doorbell at any moment!

I have felt many times that you need a college degree or a profession to be somebody in today’s society, but what I have discovered is that even though I don’t have a typical career like most working individuals, I am responsible for two human lives that will need to succeed on their own someday.  A stay at home mother is not someone who is just  “watching the kids,”  we are several important people molded into one.

A Stay At Home Mother Really Is…

A NURSE: How my heart breaks when I see my little ones crying over a “boo boo!”  Sometimes it may be a little scrape or it may be as big as a broken bone. It may even be an unexpected high fever and a night of coughing and Tylenol, but rest assured your sick little angels will feel  much better knowing that mommy is taking care of them!  Luckily I haven’t had the opportunity to deal with any major catastrophes….yet, but I know they may burst upon me at any given moment.  I will, of course prepare myself for the worst…shall the worst ever come (I hope not!) But all mothers will be there to help their babies through these painful moments.

A TEACHER: It amazes me how much children learn before they are even old enough to attend school.  We teach them how to clap,  sing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star,” brush their hair, tie their shoes, and even dress themselves.  Of course we can’t forget the ever loving job of potty training!  Kids love to learn and it builds their self esteem when they finally “figured it out!” Of course it makes me proud to know that I taught them how to do it.

A DISCIPLINARIAN: This is one of the hardest things I’ve had to learn as a new mother. In this crazy world, children need to be directed down the right path. If we are not there to show them right from wrong, they will figure it out themselves…the hard way. Parents these days are becoming more afraid to discipline and instead, choosing to be their “friend” rather than a parent.  If you keep giving him what he wants he is going to expect you to give in every time. Your child knows he will get his way, and he will end up losing his respect for you.  Truth be told, children need, and actually WANT discipline!  They may hate it now but trust me, your kids will thank you for it in the future!

A LEADER: This should pretty much  go hand in hand with disciplinarian, but I will say that being a leader for your children is the most rewarding “task” you will ever have in your full time mothering career. Its our job to guide them into adulthood and let become who you molded them to be.  I can’t wait to see my children choose their career path, or get married and have children of their own.  Knowing they made the right decisions in their life because of how we raised them is an awesome feeling. Sure, they will make their mistakes, but learning from those mistakes with a good heart and self confidence will take them far.

In Conclusion…

Kids love the idea of spending time with mommy, and the thought of someone else raising my children just so I can have a job doesn’t feel right to me.  They are my kids and it is my responsibility to make sure they are getting the best out of life.  I love knowing that as a stay home mom, can provide everything they need from me.

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